letter #6
Dear Snotmonster,
I don’t think I’ve gone a day without thinking about you. It’s driving me insane. I just want to forget it all and move on but I don’t know how.
What’s wrong with me?
Peanut
letter #5
Dear Snotmonster,
I feel like I’m the one missing you more….I’m pretty sure you don’t even think of me and have moved on. I wonder if you even loved me…
Peanut
letter #4
Dear Snotmonster,
I’m slowly coming to terms with myself that we’re no longer together. It still makes me cry when I think about it because you were my best friend.
I promise I’m trying to be stronger.
I love you still…and I miss you so much.
Love,
Peanut
Letter #3
Dear Snotmonster,
You won’t believe how much I ate for dinner. You’d probably laugh at me while eating just as much as me at the same time. Today has been so hard. A lot of things today reminded me of you…my heart hurts because it knows it’s missing it’s other half. I haven’t broken the news to my parents because I know they’ll be so disappointed. I keep thinking if I don’t say it out loud that it didn’t happen.
Today…I really wanted to pick up the phone and call you to tell how I almost face planted getting off the metro escalators and I can just imagine how you would laugh at me. I miss that laugh…I know I’ll survive and move on but it’s just so hard right now. I feel like every stupid little thing reminds me of you. I see your car everywhere…anytime I pass by Starbucks it reminds me of how you wanted that D.C. cup…even seeing people play basketball reminds me of you and how much you love playing basketball.
I promise these letters will stop but right now it’s my only form of communication to you even though you’re not even reading them.
I’m really struggling to get past us…well you…
I miss you a lot.
Love,
Peanut
Letter #2
Dear Snotmonster,
I woke up this morning really missing you. I dreamt that we were in Chicago together and we were both working and meeting up for dinner after. We were still together…sigh I’ve never missed someone as much as I’ve missed you. I’m trying so hard to stay strong and move forward but everything reminds me of you. I still love you.
Love,
Peanut
Letter #1
Hi..
I miss you….alot. I think I miss you most when I want to talk to you about my music class. I want to tell you all the ridiculous things my professor says and how I always get called on even though I don’t raise my hand. I especially want to tell you how much I missed music being a part of my life and how happy I am that taking this class lets me back into that world. Mostly, I just want to hear your voice. I know deep down that we would have never worked out but I think I’m stupid or naive or all the above because I keep hoping that we do. It’s so hard waking up every day and going to bed every night knowing I can’t tell you how my day was or how much something reminded me of you.
I love you and miss you alot.
Peanut
sometimes
i wonder when things will look up. it’s been so hard pretending that i’m happy and that i’m not hurting.
surviving
once again, i’m attempting to survive this heartbreak. i’ve been ignoring it in order to just move on with my life but sometimes, i just crack. where do i go from here? it hurts so much. and i can’t keep ignoring it. it’s not like it’s going to magically go away.
i don’t want to keep feeling like this. i just want to forget.
every single day
i pray to god to give me the strength to survive another day.
i don’t think he heard me today…i’m so close to calling it quits and giving up. it’s a sad reality when the only thing stopping me is my own fear of what comes next.
what do i have to do to be happy? what more do i need to sacrifice to be happy? how much of myself do i need to forget to be happy?
today, i wasn’t strong enough. today, i wanted to give up but i didn’t. today, i needed support and strength the most but it never came. i lost faith in the world i live in and the people around me today.
